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Posts Tagged ‘boulder’

I’m With Stupid – December 2, 2016

THE RIGHT WAR ON THE WRONG BATTLEFIELD
by Todd Hartley

Todd Hartley-smallWith the news last month that four cities — Boulder, San Francisco, Oakland and Albany, California — had voted to join cities like Berkeley, Philadelphia and Chicago in taxing sugary beverages, it got me wondering which beverages would be getting taxed and which wouldn’t. There’s a lot of sugar out there, after all, and it seems to me that these taxes could end up getting applied indiscriminately if not handled correctly.

So, being the diligent researcher that I am, I decided to look into the issue. It turns out that the basic rule is that if it has added sugar, it gets taxed. If it doesn’t, it doesn’t. This means that non-diet sodas, iced teas and sports drinks will get taxed by the ounce, while 100 percent fruit juices with no added sugar will not. Read the rest of this entry →

02

12 2016

I’m With Stupid – July 15, 2016

LET BOULDER MAKE ALL YOUR CHOICES FOR YOU
by Todd Hartley

Todd Hartley-smallDo all of you guys remember the Good Humor man, or was that just an East Coast thing? You’d better believe I remember him. I consider his ice-cream truck an important part of my summer memories.

For those of you who don’t know, the Good Humor man was a guy who sold Good Humor-brand ice-cream treats out of a truck that played a distinctive jingle that must have been written by Pavlov himself, because when you heard that jingle, you immediately stopped what you were doing — you could be in the middle of pitching a baseball and you’d just drop it on the ground — and sprinted for the parking lot to get a King Cone or a strawberry shortcake bar.  Read the rest of this entry →

15

07 2016

I’m With Stupid – May 22, 2015

I’M A BOY, BUT MY MA WON’T ADMIT IT
by Todd Hartley

Todd Hartley-smallI know I like to make fun of Boulder a lot in this column as a bastion of liberal fascism, and a lot of the time Boulder doesn’t really deserve it. But then, a lot of the time, it does.

I’m going to tell you this story in the plainest language I can so as not to taint it with my opinions yet. Then I’ll give you an earful. But first, I’ll let it stand on its own merits.

Just this past week, a Boulder woman named Kai McKenzie filed a civil-rights complaint against the Boulder Valley School District, Read the rest of this entry →

22

05 2015

I’m With Stupid – March 27, 2015

MEET BOB NOXIOUS, MY LOCAL LIBRARIAN
by Todd Hartley

Todd Hartley-smallAt my local library, in the parking lot, by two of the spots near the door, there are signs that read, “Hybrid Low-Emission Parking Only.”

Excuse me while I go puke, would you?

OK, I’m back.

Parking for low-emission and hybrid vehicles only? What kind of bleeding-heart, sanctimonious, snobtastic, douchey horse crap is that? Read the rest of this entry →

27

03 2015


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