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Posts Tagged ‘republicans’

I’m With Stupid – November 11, 2016

THE THINKER WHO THUNK THE UNTHINKABLE
by Todd Hartley

Todd Hartley-smallDid you ever have one of those moments where you wondered if everything really was just a figment of your imagination? Well, it happens to me a lot, and I finally realized why. It’s because, apparently, everything is just a figment of my imagination. Nothing else could explain what happened Tuesday night.

No, the only way Donald Trump could possibly be elected president of the United States of America would be if I dreamt it. So I think all you imaginary readers need to give me some credit. I did some pretty creative dreaming on this one, didn’t I? Read the rest of this entry →

11

11 2016

I’m With Stupid – December 18, 2015

THE MANCHURIAN TRUMPIDATE AND HIS BIG HAIR SECRET
by Todd Hartley

Todd Hartley-smallI have to admit, I haven’t watched any of the Republican presidential debates yet, I don’t follow the polls and I’ve never visited any of the candidates’ websites to learn their positions on the issues, so I honestly don’t know much about what’s going on with the upcoming primaries. I heard some real estate developer and reality-TV star was leading the pack, but that sounded like a joke to me.

Given my lack of knowledge about all that, I hope you’ll forgive me when I ask: Who is this Donald Trump fellow with the wacky hair whose name and face I can’t seem to avoid even when I’m doing everything I can to avoid them? Read the rest of this entry →

18

12 2015

I’m With Stupid – February 27, 2015

HOW TO MAKE SURE YOU’RE BUYING A CHRISTIAN POTATO
by Todd Hartley

Todd Hartley-smallI don’t know if you heard, but earlier this week in Idaho, the Kootenai County Republican Central Committee voted on a proposal to have Idaho declared a Christian state. I don’t know what that means in terms of such a thing ever happening, but being that the opening words of the First Amendment are “Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion or prohibiting the free exercise thereof,” I don’t think that particular idea’s going to make it very far. Read the rest of this entry →

27

02 2015

I’m With Stupid – October 4, 2013

A BEAUTIFUL AUTUMN DESPITE WASHINGTON’S WORST EFFORTS
by Todd Hartley

Todd Hartley-smallI went for a hike with my dogs on Tuesday, the first day of the dreaded government shutdown, and I have to say that it was the most glorious autumn day I’ve ever experienced in my 43 years of living in both New England and Colorado.

This was not because of the shutdown, mind you. In fact, we wanted to go for a hike at the Maroon Bells, but thanks to the inaction of the petulant douche bags in our House of Representatives, the Bells were closed, so we had to go elsewhere. Read the rest of this entry →

04

10 2013

I’m With Stupid – July 29, 2011

REVISITING LISA SIMPSON’S ‘CESSPOOL ON THE POTOMAC’
by Todd Hartley

Editor’s note: This column is solely the opinion of “I’m With Stupid” and does not necessarily represent the views of anyone else, even though it probably does. The following is an open letter to all congressmen, congresswomen, senators, senatrixes, cabinet members, Obama administration members, White House staffers and pretty much everyone else in Washington, D.C., who is even tangentially involved in the federal government.

Dear jackasses,

Today, as we stand on the verge of a debt-related crisis that could plunge our great nation – and, indeed, the world at large – ever deeper into financial chaos, there are a few important things for you all to know. Read the rest of this entry →

29

07 2011

I’m With Stupid – December 3, 2010

GAY BIRDS JUST WANT TO SERVE THEIR COUNTRY TOO
by Todd Hartley

Being neither Christian nor particularly conservative, I’ve never had any problems with homosexuals, so I may not be the most qualified person to opine on the subject of gays and lesbians serving in the U.S. military. Nevertheless, opine I will, as this issue has become too important for a lazy, ill-informed spewer of opinions such as myself not to offer his two cents’ worth.

I think the words that best sum up my feelings about other people’s sexual orientation would have to be “Who cares?” Read the rest of this entry →

03

12 2010


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